I have never actually had one of those moments where you think, "this *has* to be a dream, I'm going to wake up any second now...." Until today. That sounds dramatic, but it's the truth. Let me back up.
Monday morning I had my regular doctors appointment. This is our 4th (and last) baby so I had been miserable for weeks. I have a chronic health condition that adds to the misery because I can't take the medicine that I need to keep it under control while pregnant. BUT, I was nearing the end of the pregnancy, due January 4, 2012 so there was a light at the end of the tunnel! Everything checked out fine at the doc on Monday and Tuesday morning after the kids went to school, I headed up to the hospital for my routine, bi-weekly NST. They hooked me up to the monitors and I took my phone out to get schooled at Words With Friends while I waited for them to come and unhook me and tell me I could leave.
About ten minutes into the thirty minute test, the nurse peeked her head in and said, "Are you feeling those contractions?" I told her that yes, I was, but they were the norm lately. They weren't even really uncomfortable, just there really. I proceeded to have regular contractions every 3-5 minutes. So she kept me for an hour then called my doctor who decided to keep me for 24 hours for observation. They were paranoid about sending me home since my longest of my 3 previous labors was only 7 hours from start to finish and this was my fourth. Even though I wasn't due for weeks, they got me to a room. Within another hour or so, it was obvious that the baby was coming that day. Not what I planned on when I left the house that morning. I'd been so good about having the house clean and organized and today was NOT one of those days. PLUS, I left the house without eating that morning and now they were telling me I couldn't eat or drink until after I delivered. Not what I expected at all. I wanted to go home. I didn't come in to have a baby. I just came for my test.
Everything moved too quickly after that, and by the evening, I had delivered our new daughter at 36 weeks.
|BRITTA COLISE CAMPBELL|
5 lbs, 3 oz.
All of our children had been on the smaller side, so though Britta was tee-tiny, it wasn't something we hadn't experienced before. One thing we weren't prepared for was when they told me today that while I was free to go home, Britta was not. She isn't eating well, and what she does eat, she isn't able to keep down. She is just too tiny to go home when she isn't holding a stable weight.
So I was trying desperately to get her to eat this afternoon, staring out the hospital window and thinking, "this is so totally a dream...." but it's not. Thankfully, they are letting me stay in the hospital with her until she goes home, but I miss my other 3 kids desperately. It is so hard to be away from them, and this is not how I expected to be recovering from child birth. I miss those sleepy first days with my husband at home and our babies. Instead, I haven't slept in 3 days, I haven't eaten a good meal and I am sitting in a hospital room alone, just waiting for little Britta to gain a little weight so that we can go home. I'm a little overwhelmed right now.
Please, think good thoughts for her. They are needed and appreciated!